Horse Power
by Tess 4 5
Summary: Another short fun-thing that had invaded my mind and which had turned into a few chapters. Something that started at a crime scene next to a riding path in a small wood west of London. The detectives have a new case. Later we learn of a different side of Barbara that Tommy never would have thought being possible but he definitely appreciates it.
1. One

**Author's usual notes and disclaimer:** I don't own any of the original characters nor the original Inspector Lynley Mysteries – they belong to Elizabeth George and the BBC. I have borrowed the characters from the TV-Show and solely own the ideas of _my_ stories and the developments _I've_ let them go through.

Please write a PM if I did something terribly wrong. Thanks!

Please read and review! More thanks!

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 **Author's note and summary:** Another short fun-thing that had invaded my mind and which had turned into a few chapters. Something that started at a crime scene next to a riding path in a small wood west of London. The detectives have a new case. Later we learn of a different side of Barbara that Tommy never would have thought being possible but he definitely appreciates it. Enjoy...

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 **HORSE POWER**

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In the back of his head he remembered that he probably had been here before. It was a dark tree shaded road he had to drive. The crime scene DI Tommy Lynley was called to on this sunny Saturday morning, when he really could have better been enjoying the sun on his veranda with another cup of tea, was a bit off-side, so he parked his precious Bristol at the kerb between a familiar motorbike and the van from SOCO, climbed over the crash barrier and stumbled more than he walked down a steep embankment. It looked like Lafferty had been the first to arrive here. It was _his_ beloved bike.

On his way he wondered what it could be that delayed his Sergeant's arrival this time.

Someone anonymous had found a male body and called the police and although he knew that she had been informed before him her car had not yet been here when Lynley had arrived. DS Barbara Havers, on call this weekend like him, of course, had been in late for almost the entire previous week, and by the way got off as soon as appropriately possible, so she might have found a new pastime that kept her busy all the time. Maybe she's going to the gym, he thought. He knew the refreshing effects of his rides in Cornwall and Barbara not only looked well-conditioned lately but also very relaxed and happy which could be the results of some sports.

Or some _one_ , he thought.

Suddenly the DI felt a certain, well-known sting in his heart. Since they were friends, or so he thought, and rather more than friends in his opinion, she could at least have told him she was dating someone. This was disappointing in so many ways.

* * *

Deep in thoughts about his Sergeant Lynley's foot got entangled with some roots and he almost fell so when he stumbling arrived at the scene, which was not yet secured by officers, he loudly cursed. He had reached the thick scrub next to a small path he now remembered. Once he had been on a ride here with his sister who had visited him in London on her way back south when she had brought two new mares from Scotland for their horse business in Cornwall. Cleaning his trousers Lynley muttered another curse. This was not at all as pleasant as it had been years ago.

* * *

Then he saw the behind of a woman, nicely wrapped in the black leather of some tight pants.

"Oh, sorry, Miss, I didn't mean to be rude." the DI apologised into her back. She must be the new trainee Lafferty had mentioned earlier this week with very describing words. He obviously was not too far from the truth, Lynley thought with an appreciative look at her well shaped figure.

Until now she had been bent over something that looked as if it formerly had been a human being and she had cautiously rummaged through the clothings with rubber-gloved hands. Lafferty looked up from the fingernails he was examining and nodded a silent greeting towards the Inspector.

Apart from those leather pants the woman also wore a simple dark blue sweatshirt and a red bandanna was looped around her neck. Wasn't SOCO supposed to wear those white scene of crime suits? Now he could see her body shaking. It obviously was very bad what she saw.

"Sir, since when am I 'Miss'?" She got up, still laughing, and waved a wallet before her boss' nose. "And since when do you mind being rude in front of me?"

"Obviously I've started now, Havers." Lynley answered a bit more incisive than he had intended to sound. This well-proportioned bottom hardly could be his Barbara. She only wore floppy blouses and wide trousers that hid every possible curve and today her hair looked quite different than usually.

"You are blonde." he stated the obvious. Although he only knew her strawberry blonde undefined haircut he definitely liked what he saw now.

Lafferty snorted a stifled chuckle and if he had looked at Lynley in that moment he could have been a second victim this morning, with daggers shooting from the DI's eyes.

* * *

"Well, I thought I'd try something different, so I went to the hairdresser yesterday afternoon." Turning a bit rosy Barbara raked her hand through her new hairdo, a short cut light mop of tousled hair, and added slightly uncertain that she had been a bit shocked herself. "It's quite strange to have it cut that way..."

"It looks gorgeous." Lynley had to clear his throat because he not only thought her hair looked gorgeous, he also found the rest of her unusual dashing appearance very attractive. As if he never had seen her as a woman. Which was in fact true, he had to admit to himself, at least on a physical basis although lately he had become quite attracted by his partner of so many years he had stopped counting, and he had searched her proximity wherever it was possible but for now he swallowed down the rising admiration seeing that new fitting and matching style.

For a brief second his thoughts had been all but appropriate for a crime scene. And then there was her new secret pastime that flashed through his mind in a quite ugly way. Lynley had to keep himself busy with the task at hand. "Well, what do we have here?"

"Male, white, but probably southern European, mid-twenties, two stab wounds so far. And a missing face." Lafferty's voice answered. "So many blows upon this face of his, and made no deeper wounds?"

"That's not nice, Stuart." Barbara grinned. "In fact his face is utterly destroyed so scratching could not make it worse..."

The pathologist now laughed out loud. "Touché, Barb. Nice repost! And very iambish as well..."

When both conspirationally winked at each other the DI slowly became annoyed. "Really? _Iambish_?! 't is not the Shakespeare ev'ning course, nor are we here in Maiden Lane. Would you both at least will keep in mind that we are here to work?"

A sudden pain had pierced his heart. He never had recognised how close his Sergeant was with the pathologist and he never had recognised that he could be jealous of Lafferty, a married man but not averse to flirting on every possible occasion. Could it be that he and his Sergeant...?!

The melody of his question though made the two laugh even harder. Barbara tried to sober up. "Sorry, Sir."

He shook his head in disbelief. "What else, Lafferty?"

"Well, here we have: expensive designer jeans, a fancy jacket, a trendy hairdo, nicely cut fingernails... I'd say he was a time-pleaser, an affectioned ass!"

Barbara sniggered into her bandanna.

Lynley sighed. "Right, _William_... Well, what's in his wallet?"

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	2. Two

**A/N:** Oh, I just realised that this time I have no chapter titles. How very unusual. I think I become derelict :-D **  
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There was nothing useful in the victim's wallet. There were no ID hints except for a photo of the victim with a woman and another man, a worn out business card from an estate manager and a handwritten phone number in an empty book of matches from a well known nightclub. Fingerprints would be taken later so now they carefully bagged everything and climbed up the embankment back to the road. Meanwhile some uniformed police officers had secured the area with a white and blue barrier tape. One of them had reported that there had been a young man lurking around in the nearby undergrowth but had vanished as quick and shy as a fox when they had addressed him.

There was a wild camping site on the other side of the road up here, one of the local officers told them, so he probably was one of its inhabitants. DI Lynley and DS Havers went there to ask around but learned nothing at all from the tight lipped vagrants so they returned to the kerb where the vehicles parked. Lafferty had just climbed there too and now sat smoking on the crash barrier.

"SOCO will have a few more things to do but I've finished here. Apart from his face and the stab wounds I've found burns on his hands, probably cigarette burns, and some dark marks on his throat. You'll get to know more with my PM." He deeply inhaled the smoke of his cigarette. "Tomorrow at about 12. At the earliest. I have no idea yet what could have caused it but his face, that is, the rest of it, looks disgusting. As if a horse trampled on it."

"Indeed." the DI agreed. "Well, we should return to the office, Barbara, and see what we could wring out of those things."

* * *

He held up the evidence bags and turned towards his car. Then he loudly cursed. Someone had punctured his front tyre so now it was flat. "I'm going back to those bloody tramps and get the name of the culprit out of those dossers!" he grumbled but Barbara could keep him from that.

"Sir, we better focus on that murder. Just change the tyre. We can pursue that issue later. And maybe you've only driven through some spikes?" She put a hand on his arm and gave him a calming smile. When he still looked angry she began to softly stroke his arm. It had been unintentional and Barbara only realised it when his face softened. She also realised that he had tensed his muscles and thought to herself that he was quite in a good shape. Feeling the heat creeping up her face she quickly withdraw her hand and offered him some help with the tyre.

She really should stop thinking about her boss as a man, she scolded herself. A very handsome man that is, well-mannered and even sometimes cute. Although Barbara knew it was futile she sometimes thought of the image of him in jeans and very tight T-shirt, a heartfelt laugh in his face, addressing her and putting his arm around her shoulder like he so often had done when once she had accompanied him to his estate where his sister Judith was giving a birthday party. It had been a nice and relaxed weekend and they had spent many hours outside or at the stables. Lynley almost had succeeded convincing her to take some riding lessons so she could accompany him on his morning rides but she politely had refused. She had rather preferred watching him exercising his horse in the paddock and rub it down afterwards. She sometimes had fantasised of him rubbing _her_ back in the evening and sometimes she even still fantasised a bit further - but not now!

They were at a crime scene and she should not think about stuff like that at all! Involuntarily she sighed.

* * *

He took it as a sigh of annoyance with his temper once more so Lynley abruptly turned and brusquely answered that he could manage changing the tyre on his own and maybe while he was busy she could call DC Nkata that he would come to the office and check on that phone number they had found. Barbara sighed again. She knew she never would be able to understand men but this one was a real tough task. One minute he looked as if he was about to take her in his arms - which would not happen anyway but he at least looked like that or so she thought - and the other minute he grumbled or bossed her about as if she was the origin of any bad situation.

How could she know how close she was right now. She did not know that he was angry with himself that he could not find the way to tell her that he thought she was beautiful and his soothing shield for his temper. She observed him walking to the back of his car where he cursed again.

"Oh, great, they also have flattened the rear- no, _both_ rear- oh, bloody brilliant, those felons have flattened _all_ the tyres! I definitely-"

"... _won't_ pour your anger over them, Sir!" Barbara quickly interjected and took a step between her boss and the direct way to the camp site.

* * *

Lafferty had to grin into another direction. He usually loved watching their Punch and Judy show and enjoyed how both bickered and bantered or even loudly and hot-blooded argued and all but recognised that they should rather kiss each other. This was at least his opinion in this matter but he also knew pretty well when his smirk was the opposite of helpful.

The Detectives had one of those loud and wordy arguments after which they went to the camp anyway - with a much calmer Inspector now - but in the end and with the help of Lynley's angry appearance nobody had seen nor heard and least of all done anything. Lynley called for a recovery vehicle and still fumed about wasting time with those sodding punks.

"I can wait here, Sir, and oversee the removal of your precious toy." Lafferty offered. "To which garage should it be brought?"

They agreed on a trustworthy expert and only then, when he turned to her and had wanted to usher her to her car, Lynley recognised that Barbara's Mini was not parked here. He looked around with a confused expression. "Where have you parked your car, Barbara? Is there another access to that spot down there or are you with the horse?"

"Oh, no, I'm with the bike." she answered standing at the now open door of the SOCO's van, putting on a leather jacket that had been in there and pointing with her chin towards the familiar blue T45. The curves of a similarly blue helmet looked out from under the stretcher.

"You what?!" Shock was not even beginning to describe the expression on his face. The T45 was Lafferty's motorbike. She could not have sat behind him when he had driven here. Or could she? The green eyed monster peeked around the corner of his heart again.

"I'm with the bike, Sir." Barbara repeated, completely unaware of Lynley's confusion and rising jealousy. She started to prepare the straps of the helmet to put it on. "Oh, that raises the question how _you_ will get away from here, Sir."

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 **A/N:** The T45 is a fictional motorbike (but the Cooper T45 is quite a classy car) and I've had so much fun creating that logo for the story cover :-)


	3. Three

**A/N:** Thanks for your reviews so far. It's very enjoyable to read them! Oh, and sorry that the chapters are so short. I try to become wordier after this one o.O **  
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"You are with the bike?!" Lynley echoed with the most unbelieving face Barbara had ever seen.

"Oh, yes, well, it was a cool sunny morning, so I thought I could enjoy a ride today. I knew I was on call but I had hoped" she pointed with the helmet in her hands in the direction of the crime scene. "there wouldn't be such a-"

"Enjoy a ride?!" He still could not believe it and it only slowly crept into his mind. The leather pants, the boots, the bandanna - all clear signs that she obviously was with the motorcycle but he could not imagine when she had learned to ride a bike and that she actually did just that. But she sounded as if she had not come here in the pathologist's back but rode it on her own. But it was _Lafferty's_ bike. "Since when does Lafferty borrow away his precious bike?!"

Now Lafferty openly watched them. Their show was complete fun so he simply lit another cigarette.

"Oh, no, Sir, it's mine now. Stuart had bought a new chopper and he offered me his old one so I-"

"I never knew you could even ride a motorcycle!?"

"I've learned it before I've learned how to drive a car, Sir." Now Barbara was quite amused too. There were not many situations when she could catch her boss so confused.

"I can't believe it! But then how did _you_ get here, Lafferty? Until now I've thought _you_ were with that infernal machine..."

"Oh, we've actually been together on that ride." he answered quite casually. Lynley's heart fell again. His eyes narrowed slightly and Stuart did not miss it. "My new toy is in the garage because there were a few things to check. You know, it's probably a rogue bike - malfunctioning light machine, a jamming accelerator cable, such things... So Barb came around, we brought my bike to the garage and before bringing me home we made a detour."

"A detour?" Tommy felt like a parrot.

* * *

"It's really wonderful weather for a ride, Sir. Sunny, dry and not really warm which is good when you're wrapped in leather." Barbara winked at her boss. "And when HQ called Stu it was the best to drive him here because I knew I'd be called too. That's why I was here before _you_ arrived."

After a few seconds in which the DI looked from one to the other and tried to erase the jealous thoughts about them spending an enjoyable morning ride together it finally crept into his mind how that was even possible. He harrumphed. It was hard not to become more jealous.

"And you have allowed _him_ to sit behind you?!" Lynley could picture them sitting so close and highly indecent. It was a very unpleasant image that was forming in his head.

Barbara raised an eyebrow. She very well had heard his subtle accusation. "Well, I do _not_ allow everybody to ride pillion on my motorcycle, Sir!"

Her indignation was a certain relief for Tommy so he boldly asked if she would allow _him_ to sit behind her. "That way I won't have to call a cab or get back to the Yard with uniform." He doubted she would answer positive anyway.

Barbara laughed. She knew he never would take a seat on a motorbike so she felt quite safe. "Hahaha, do you have a helmet?"

Now Lafferty stepped in. "You can take mine if it fits. That is, if you dare, Sir."

For this suggestion Stuart earned a death glare from Barbara that highly amused him and even a blind could have read her lips forming a 'No!' unseen by her boss. DI Lynley in fact really did not see it because his eyes were on the motorbike. A ride with Barbara would be nice, he thought. It was not exactly what he had dreamed about so many times lately, he would prefer it was on a horseback in the green meadows of his estate, but this motor horse certainly would do for now.

Lafferty saw his slightly dreamy expression and went on. "I'll get a lift from the boys from SOCO anyway so I won't need my helmet today. Just try it on."

* * *

As chance would have it Lafferty's helmet almost perfectly fit on Lynley's head. Barbara swallowed seeing her boss' challenging and Stuart's entirely smug grin. Of course she knew how to ride with a passenger, she had done it with Stuart this morning and she had done it with others multiple times before in her younger days when she rode a motorbike on a regular basis.

But this was Lynley, her boss, the man she avoided physical contact with because she in fact often searched and almost always desperately longed for a touch but was tired of the frustration every time those brief moments ended or never had happened at all. Now he would sit behind her and it made her nervous even though she had not yet taken her seat.

Slightly awkward Tommy had entered the motorbike. When he was younger he had owned a fancy scooter but that was decades ago and completely different. He also never had sat in the rear like this. Of course _he_ had been the driver and his girls would sit behind him. Now his girl would sit in front of him.

And she was not even his girl but his Sergeant and he should not have such thoughts about her at all. The grip of his hands on the little pannier rack in his back tightened when Barbara climbed into her seat, wriggled into a comfortable position only millimetres in front of his crotch and started the engine.

* * *

Lafferty was again openly smirking at the offered sight of the two detectives. Especially the Earl of Asherton in his fine suit and coat looked quite misplaced on that rocker bike.

"Sir, on our ride-" Barbara began. Lafferty had to cover a laugh with coughing. "-will you please follow my every move? It makes it easier for me to handle you. It. I mean riding the bike."

Lafferty turned away choking on a stifled laughter and tried to get some air. This scene and especially her choice of words was hilarious.

"Of course, Barbara." Lynley earnestly nodded.

"Have fun, you two!" Lafferty called after them in a honeyed voice when Barbara drove on and lifted one hand to wave good bye. Grounding his cigarette butt under his heel he added a smugly muttered "Have fun on your so well deserved joyride."

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	4. Four

**A/N: Here are a few more words ;-)**

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"Move with me, Sir!" Barbara called over her shoulder to Tommy. "It's not easy to have you in my back!"

 _You have no idea!_ the man in her back thought. It felt entirely good to sit there, to slightly feel her back in his chest, her thighs softly moving against his, her moves steering the bike. It actually felt _too_ good to have her, let's name it, between his legs. Focussing on her moves he tried to forget how they actually sat there but it did not work and his wandering mind brought him out of her step every now and then.

Although she had to drive them back to the station Barbara could not really go on like this. She had difficulties to focus on the road and forget about who it was that sat in her back. She also could do with more assistance from Lynley but he seemed to be a bit absent minded. At a junction she had to address him twice before he reacted.

"Hm? Yes?"

"Really, Sir, you should follow my moves because otherwise it's too difficult to drive. You're too heavy."

"I'm what?"

"Too heavy. Too tall. I've never had such a giant in my back." He couldn't see her eyes widening at her own words.

"You mean a giant belly?"

"No, Sir, I mean your six feet one."

"Point four."

"What?"

"Six feet one point four."

* * *

Barbara groaned about him insisting on that part of an inch that was not even recorded. "Like I said, you're a giant."

"And you don't like my belly." He quipped. "Yes, I should do more workouts." Then Lynley realised she had talked about his exact size but before he could ask where she knew it from she went on talking.

"Sir, I've never mentioned a belly." Barbara thought about the nice little sign that her boss was not in his twenties any more and smiled. She actually loved his belly and thinking of it she remembered a few dark hairs there. As if she would be able to get rid of the image that had burned its copy into her brain many years ago she shook her head. "You're just tall and that makes it difficult for me to drive if you don't follow my moves."

"But you think I'm fat?" he laughed. It was such a fun to tease her.

"Stop it! Don't be ridiculous!" Barbara also laughed. "You're not fat at all. Quite the opposite!" Even though she only had muttered those last words he had heard it and it made him feel flattered. Lynley grinned and followed her motions through a smoothly driven curve. He felt safe behind her. At least as a traffic participant. Not so much for his state of mind which was slipping across ice.

After driving through another roundabout where he already had his mind on something distinctively other than this motorbike ride Barbara called over her shoulder that he probably better put his hands on her waist so he could feel her moves earlier. The words were out before she could stop them. She swallowed and was glad that he could not see her blushing face. It burned hot when she finally felt him tentatively placing his hands where she wanted them to be. Where she really wanted them to be. Where she had wanted them to rest for such a long time. Although he probably would not hold her like that if it was not on a bike. Nonetheless her stomach was somersaulting in delight.

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"A small and beautiful young lady riding a bike with an old and fat giant. What will people think seeing us in that position?"

"Oh, shut up! You're not fat and you're not old, Sir." And I'm not beautiful and lucky you, she thought, if it is your only concern what people might think about us.

And that is by far not my only concern, _he_ thought. In fact he did not care at all what people might say. Right at the moment he only cared for their proximity. Not only had he put his hands on her waist he also had slid closer to her back. Now his thighs were pressed against hers and his chest completely and almost permanently touched her back. Although his mind now wandered even more his body really moved better with hers without even focussing on it. At every corner he could feel with his whole body where she would be leaning to. And his hands secretly explored how slim her waist was in fact. She usually covered it with ill-fitting large blouses or jumpers but in his opinion Barbara really should not hide what he could feel now. For him she should not hide anything. He just wanted to explore more, slowly, tenderly, and above all with less clothes. Tommy harrumphed.

* * *

Unbeknownst to him the woman in his front had started to sweat not only by the midday's sun shining on her leather jacket. She had to focus on the road, Barbara told herself multiple times, but it was too hard with his body pressed into her back. It felt as if his legs were surrounding her and more and more she caught herself thinking about how he would feel doing this without this motorbike, without the forced situation of riding the bike back to the Yard, without this case. Without clothes even. Tommy's hands softly nudged her waist from time to time and it always gave her stomach a small pleasant twitch. She would love to go on driving slalom with him behind her following her moves and increasing the pressure of his legs on the right and then on the left again.

Once more, Barbara realised, and it had been no rare moment lately, she was thinking of him as Tommy. Of course he constantly asked her to call him by his given name, but she knew she should not call him that, not even in her thoughts like she did at the moment, because her silly mind would put him into a position he never would think of occupying. But right now, in fact, all she could feel were the roaring vibrations of the bike and the tall body in her back. That so very male body of this so very handsome man. His thumbs palpably stroked the sides of her chest.

She swallowed. Was he actually caressing her?!

He was. And he thought she was not recognising it through her jacket.

* * *

The traffic lights ahead were red. She almost had not seen it and suddenly had to brake hard. He had not seen it either and could not react in time so now Tommy's body pressed fully into Barbara's back.

"Mmh!"

Both made a sound that indicated more a shock about the sudden intimate feeling than about the hard stop and the impact of his body into hers. Stiff as statues and almost not breathing they waited until the lights turned green. Each for their own they thought and hoped that the sound was unnoticed. They also both were glad that their blushing faces had been unseen by the other. But the next red light would come for sure since they now were deep in the inner city.

* * *

The next red light was there quicker than she thought. Barbara stopped the bike, slower this time, and Tommy put his feet to the ground unlike the other times they had stopped. For certain reasons he had to change his sitting position a bit. His legs though still were slightly pressing against Barbara's from behind when he accidentally bumped his hip into her bottom again.

She involuntarily stirred on her front seat. Tommy had to close his eyes but it actually made it all worse. In his inner eye he now saw a faint image of her naked back wriggling against his own equally naked chest. Never would he have thought that a simple bike ride would elicit such fantasies that made him unconsciously move another bit towards her. He still was in a need to change his position.

Barbara felt him behind her like she was sitting too close to a burning fire. It was all but unpleasant so she tried hard to focus on the street lights when additionally his hands loosely slid down her waist onto her upper thighs. The lights never should turn green so this moment never would end, she thought, but at least it should be repeated soon without that bloody case and without any other obligations lurking in the back of their heads. And definitely without clothes. With those thoughts her face burned even hotter now. Feeling a soft grip from his hands on her thighs she involuntarily wriggled backwards with a deep sigh, her head strictly faced forward when she realised what she had done.

Still trying to find a more comfortable position he straightened his spine so his front suddenly touched her back completely from her bottom to her shoulder blades.

"Tommy!" Barbara breathed and shocked about it had to suck some air into her lungs. Her entire body tensed. Briefly she closed her eyes trying to calm down. This bike ride really was a challenge.

* * *

Behind her Tommy could not quite believe what he had just heard and wondered if she really had sighed his name or if his ears were playing tricks on him. And he was very sure she had arched into him. "Hmm?"

His deeply humming voice sent additional shivers down her back. There was no way he could have heard her, of that Barbara was sure. Quite sure. Or could he? It was not that loud and she tried to convince herself that she actually had not moaned his name. Loosening her muscles again she tried to cover it up. "Hm?" she fake innocently asked.

It was not really convincing. Barbara's voice almost pitched. She kept her eyes fixed on the street lights but could not see anything at all.

"The lights have turned green, Barbara." Tommy loudly murmured with his head almost next to hers. Inwardly he cursed those inconvenient helmets. Right in that moment he had wanted to whisper into her ear, nibble at her earlobe, give her a kiss onto that spot at her neck where he was sure she would get shivers. And he was very sure he had heard right. Barbara _had_ said his name.

Despite the warmth of the sun shining on her leather clad body she shivered again. For a brief moment Barbara had thought about him kissing the skin behind her ear without those bloody helmets on but the green lights and the cars behind her dictated she had to drive on so she put in first gear and almost was glad that they just had passed the café around the corner where they used to go to when a change of location was in order after hours sitting in the office.

This ride would soon be over, they realised, but both were not entirely sure if the end of it was welcome or not.

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	5. Five

**A/N:**

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With the last strength Barbara could muster she drove into the car park of New Scotland Yard and found a space for her bike. Quickly she stopped the engine and almost jumped off the vehicle. Taking off her helmet without looking at him and briefly ruffling through her hair she turned her back to her boss. She already was walking towards the stairs and elevators when he still tried to climb down his seat. Barbara waved a hand. He did not need to see her flushed face.

"Sorry Sir, I'm in a hurry to the Ladies. We'll meet in your office I suppose?"

"Yah, sure." Her quick exit had given him some space and very much needed time to rearrange his churning thoughts and other certain and undeniably present feelings. Harrumphing he raked a hand through his hair after taking off the helmet and carefully he looked around if somebody had watched him climbing off that metal thunder horse. Not that he felt ashamed to be driven by Barbara but his dismounting had been a bit clumsy because of his awkward attempt in hiding what he was feeling.

All the way up to the floor where his office was he permanently scolded himself for allowing himself such naughtiness, such inappropriate thoughts and despicable feelings about his Sergeant, his best friend, his loyal companion.

"My love." he whispered when the lift came to a halt. His face reddened and he hoped that the sliding doors had made enough sound to drown him out but they were alone there anyway. Barbara already stood at the door to his office and watched him approaching. She hopefully had not heard his words.

* * *

It had been the truth that she had to use the bathroom right after their arrival but more so she had to get away from him. Barbara had felt the urge to put as much distance as possible between herself and the man she had adored for so many years. All throughout those years she had learned to cope with her unrequited love for him, had put her feelings away behind layers of sarcasm and a thick wall of defence, built of self-imposed ignorance and denying, had only allowed herself a few silly dreams and one or the other soft-eyed observation when she was sure to be unobserved herself. All this was blown away on one single motorbike ride with him in her back. Barbara had felt he had been flirtatiously playing with the situation, with her in fact, but she was sure that he never would see it in that arousing way she had seen it. Her complete rapture even frightened her.

In the washing room at the sink she had tried to wash away those feelings, store them back where they belonged. If she would want to go on working with DI Lynley she had to stop thinking of him as Tommy. She had to stop thinking of his body pressed against hers or that he might do this again and most of all she had to stop fantasising of him doing this to her naked. She had to stop fantasising of him at all. The cold water in her face slightly cooled her burning hot face and her raging inner turmoil. Straightening her back one more time she grimly nodded at her reflection in the mirror, then tried a lopsided smile and cheered herself up.

"Time to get back to reality, stupid old girl!" Never again, she swore to herself would she allow him to sit in the back of her motorbike. This had been far too dangerous.

Then Barbara headed for his office and was there when the doors of the lift at the end of the hall opened and she caught his soft eyes, looking at her almost like a wounded deer pleading for a hug. This time it would be hard to get herself back on the ground and keep her there but it would work eventually. It had to. It always had. She took another deep breath and grinned at him.

After this little unexpected physicality on her bike she almost was ready to believe that she saw a tender sadness in his eyes but she quickly reminded herself again that she had to stop thinking like that so she just shook her blonde haired head with a slightly uncertain laugh. "What took you so long?" she cheekily asked with a still shaking voice. She rather would love to pull him down to her and kiss his softly curved lips.

* * *

They discarded the helmets and her gloves on the small two-seater in his office and placed their coats on the hook before they spread the evidence bags on his desk. Barbara appeared as if she was studying them but her thoughts still were on a certain bike ride. She felt his eyes on her and wondered what he might think of her and if her thoughts were written on her face.

Tommy openly watched Barbara. She seemed to concentrate on the things on his desk but he could not yet focus on the case. He still marvelled if he would find more surprises of her if he would start to really date her. Not the occasional dinner, not the usual pint after work, not the awkward surrogate woman at his side when his mother once again forced him into some social obligation, one of her boring functions where he had to appear with a woman at his side. Barbara should be the legitimate woman at his side. He had secretly loved her for too long now. He should finally dare to ask her on a date. Maybe they could go on another ride.

"We should repeat that."

"Huh?" Barbara looked up only to find him still staring at her.

"We should repeat that ride. I really enjoyed it." Tommy thought that he actually had enjoyed it too much to be appropriate but it could be a start. Another ride on that motorcycle could be their first date.

She blushed and diverted her eyes back to the desktop. Oh, yes, she had enjoyed it too. "Hmm. Yes. Although it was a bit difficult..." She blushed a bit more and shot a quick glance at her boss. "I mean, with the size difference between you and me."

Being reminded of her small frame against his chest his own sudden thoughts made him blush too. He really should try and focus on their case. Tommy watched her hands while Barbara aimlessly shoved the bags from one side to the other.

"Winnie should be here soon." she said contextless.

Then DI Lynley's phone rang and brought him down to the blood soaked earth of their case.

* * *

"Lynley here. ...Hello, Sir!" This must be Hillier, she thought. Barbara looked up and their eyes locked. He smiled apologetic while he talked. She followed his side of the conversation and drowned in his eyes. "Mhm... Yes... Near the riding path in the Western- ...yes exactly. Not very pleasant, a few wounds from torture. ... Yes... yes... a-ha... on the road... all four, Sir, but we're back at the Met with DS Havers' ...umm ...vehicle." He winked at Barbara and she returned a shy smile. "Lafferty waited for the- ...m-hm... across the road in a- ... yes, we've interviewed them twice but- ... yes... yes, well, I really haven't- ...that's not true! I just- ...m-hm ...are you sure, Sir? I mean- ...of course, Sir... no, Sir..." Barbara watched his jaw muscles tensing when he gritted his teeth with tight lips in rising anger. Hillier obviously dressed her boss down or gave straight unpleasant orders. She could hear his voice through the phone but could not understand his exact words. Tommy's hand on his desk turned into a fist and he moved his dark glare away from her eyes now. She understood that it was all but good news from the Commissioner. "...a-ha... yes, Sir... If you think this- ... m-hm... m-hm... mmh... Yes. Thank you. Bye."

The phone gave a nasty noise when Tommy banged it down on the hook.

"Oh, damn..." he grumbled and shoved the evidence bags onto an unruly pile.

"What?" Barbara slightly blanched. That call definitely was bad news.

"It seems that Hillier was _not at all pleased_ with my actions concerning those bloody blokes who covered the one who was responsible for the flat tyres on my car."

"How come he knows it yet?"

Still grumbling Tommy told her what he had learned from the Commissioner.

The tramp Tommy had grabbed at the collar and pushed against a tree when he had received such a nasty answer to his question that made him overreact, that said tramp knew a street worker who knew a politician who was very much interested in any failure of policemen so he already knew of Tommy's temper and his loss of it in another case. This politician also knew of his title and had tried to trip him up previously just to benefit from it in his political career. This politician also was distantly acquainted with the Commissioner and so this was the straight way the official disciplinary complaint had gone.

Sir Hillier had told Tommy that precisely _because_ of this intervention he really would like to have his best team on that case but his hands were tied. Lynley now was 'involved' and prejudiced and if Hillier would not pull them, and especially DI Lynley, off that case there would be an uproar and public hounding initiated by said politician. DI Hawthorpe already was informed to drum up his team to replace Lynley, Havers and Nkata.

Lynley groaned in frustration. "I'll wait for the call from the garage and that Hawthorpe would put his smug grin through this door but you can go home, Barbara. We have the weekend off from now on."

"Oh, brilliant..." Barbara muttered. Spare time was not what she needed now. With too much spare time her mind would keep dancing around that bike ride and what she was feeling for the man on the other side of the desk. It would not be good for her mental state right now.

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	6. Six

**A/N:** I'm sorry for the delay but sometimes even me has something so much better to do in real life and that may include a looooong weekend off. Yes, I did enjoy it very much! \m/

Now for you, the next chapter. Enjoy it!

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Disappointed about the sudden end of this case, and more disappointed about the fact to spend another weekend alone and not with Lynley, even if it would have been a work thing only, and the most disappointed about Lynley not holding her back Barbara collected her belongings. "Have a nice day anyway, Sir." she sadly said, not daring to look into his eyes for he might see her disappointment.

If she had looked up she would have seen his equally sad eyes but her boss had made no move to hold her back. On one hand he did not know how and to be honest he was not really in the mood to be cheered up or anything. This bike ride had been too pleasant and unexpectedly had pulled away with one swift move the thick dusty carpet he had tried to put over his physical feelings for his Sergeant. But once again, with the inappropriate treatment of the inhabitant in the illegal camp near the crime scene, he had tripped over his bloody uncontrolled temper so for now he could not explore those feelings any further. Already deep in thoughts about his stupid behaviour he let her leave.

He knew he was in love with Barbara. Mentally, physically, completely. That probably also was the reason why he lately had had such fragile, weak nerves. Barbara had been around him too close and obviously still too far away for him to reach, he thought. And he was holding back his feelings for too long now. He had been too passive for too many years. He had to do something, he told himself while brooding over that little bit of paperwork left for him on that case.

Tommy made a decision. He had to go and ask her out very soon.

* * *

"Well, Tommy, been a bad boy once again?" A smugly grinning head popped through Lynley's door without having knocked. DI Hawthorpe was there to collect the evidence bags and a to get a briefing from his colleague.

In the second he saw the other DI Tommy knew what he had to do today. It would be this evening. He would be dining with Barbara tonight. And he would start showing her that he deeply cared for her, cared for what she was doing, for what she liked. He would try to find a way into her life.

Knowing Barbara for so long he did not expect it to become easy but he would try and he thought he already knew how.

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* * *

There was a knock at her door and she almost had not heard it because she was in the backyard of the house. Fortunately she had a direct access from her flat on the ground-floor so she reached her door before there was a third knock.

Barbara's eyes widened in shock about the offered sight.

In the afternoon sun stood her boss, DI Lynley, the Earl of Asherton, clad in a brand new modern synthetic fibre motorbike outfit, with hard plastic protector inlays and reflector stripes, a shiny new helmet in the crook of his arm, elegant but functional biker boots at his feet. It really was something to look at and it left her speechless.

"Hello." Tommy said with a husky voice. Suddenly he was not so sure that he did the right thing like he was when he had gone to the biker shop this afternoon. But there was no way to stop it now although her utterly sweet appearance made it hard for him to speak. She was in old sweat pants and a baggy old jumper, both with dark stains, and her fingers were slightly oily. But the sweetest part was the smear across her cheek. Clearing his throat he just could resist the urge to tenderly wipe it away. Obviously he had disturbed her repairing something. "I thought, seeing that we have the weekend off now, that you'd take me on another ride..."

He gave her a disarming broad smile and was unaware of the hoping, deep and promising look he also gave her. Tommy had made a decision and his appearance clearly was a sign of it. He even had forgotten to shave his face today. He only had realised it when he already was about to leave his house. He had not shaved before breakfast or before he had been called to the crime scene and after they had been called off the case he had been too busy buying his new riding gear and planning the evening. Now he shyly scratched his stubbly chin.

* * *

Barbara very much appreciated it. In fact she loved it. It made his face look very male and it totally matched his biker appearance. His five o'clock shadow, or better _darkness_ , his tousled hair and his boyish smile made him look so sweetly adventurous. Suddenly Barbara had the feeling that this could be the prospect of a shared interest, something that was not at all noble and not too common too, but something they could do together. It could become something that would deepen their friendship she hoped. Something that could give her the opportunity to show him how he could get into her life. Which was a completely stupid thought she reminded herself and gave him a lopsided smile in return. But since she looked forward to the proximity with her boss she would love to take him for another ride right now - if it had been possible.

"Come on in then." she quietly invited him and was a bit shocked about how seducing she had sounded.

Unfortunately they would not have another ride today because when she had been offered some spare time she had decided to use the rest of the free afternoon in the backyard and had dismantled a part of her bike that had needed to be cleaned. But they could at least have a nice cuppa. Or a beer in the afternoon sun.

* * *

They sat down on the little wall there and stared at the immobilised bike, both with a can of cold beer in their hands. Tommy leaned back, closed his eyes and let his face be warmed by the sun.

"I've never known you have such a nice back- yard, Barbara." he mumbled. For a brief second he had paused having the flash of a thought about her bottom in leather pants speeding through his mind but he hoped that she had not recognised it.

"Mh, yah, it had been unusable for years, completely stuffed with trash and discarded furniture. The property management did not care at all because you can't use this space for something that would bring in money, not even for a veranda for my flat. But last autumn a few tenants, including me, finally raised their arse from their sofas and we've cleaned it up. Now there's room for barbecue parties. And for dismantling motorbikes."

"That's convenient."

Barbara had to laugh about it. "Yes, Sir, very convenient. And definitely cheaper than paying for a garage. How's your car, by the way?"

"Do you think I've come here by a cab in this outfit?" he winked.

She laughed again. "No, hell, of course not. Somebody might have seen you. Feeling a bit uncomfortable, are we?"

"Not at all, Barbara."

"Really, Sir, you didn't have to buy that stuff."

"But I've wanted to have another ride with you. I had to at least buy me a helmet." Now he looked into her eyes and suddenly Barbara got weak knees. Fortunately she already was seated. She blushed under his intense stare and diverted her eyes back to the oily motorbike parts. When he leaned into her to conspiratorially mumble that Lafferty's helmet did smell a bit too much of his aftershave she got goosebumps on her side but chuckled nonetheless. Being reminded of _his_ proximity she deeply inhaled _his_ scent and closed her eyes. With the sun shining on her raised face she went on without the real intention to say it aloud.

"You should have bought leather clothes, Sir. It would look gorgeous on you-" Hearing herself she had to swallow. Then she had to concentrate on a random spot so she would not have to see him seeing her blushing face. Why was she saying this? How could she get herself out of it? "...and I believe there is enough money to get you into the best fitting and finest soft leather things FBT would be able to offer. And it would be more authentic on my chopper bike."

* * *

"FBT?" Tommy's heart raced. She had thought about him in leather. That was an interesting fact. A very promising interesting fact.

"Yah. _Finlay's Biker Tailoring_. Unthinkably expensive and noble."

"Mh..." Turning his own face towards the sun Tommy closed his eyes too and answered that he had decided to buy, and he said exactly that, the newest shit on the market. It made Barbara broke out in a loud fit of laughter.

"What?" he grinned.

"Nothing, Sir. Want another beer?" Without waiting for an answer she already went inside and he followed.

"Yes please. And would you mind calling me Tommy? I don't think rockers like we are use any honorific form of address."

Once again his smile was disarming. Barbara had stopped at the open fridge door and quizzically watched him. She could not actually call him by his given name, this she had discussed with herself often enough. But somehow he was right. Of course they were no rockers but right at the moment they were, well, at least somehow, bikers. Still he was her boss and such. Still he smiled encouraging at her.

The alarm of the still open fridge door finally made her break eye contact with him. She took two more half-pint cans from the fridge and chuckled that she could call him 'mate' or 'buddy' if he wanted it to be more informal.

"That's not my given name, but it will do for now." His eyes displayed his disappointment and she clearly recognised it. One day, she told herself, she would dare calling him Tommy.

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	7. Seven

**A/N:**

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Her stomach grumbled extraordinarily loud. Lynley had plonked down on her sofa and asked if she had eaten anything today. "I've only had some breakfast until now too. Do you allow me to invite you for an early dinner?"

"Mh. No, not really." His heart sank, his plans burst. "Delivery?" she suggested instead and explained it. "I'm not at all in the mood to dress up now, Sir. ...Buddy." He just grinned again. Buddy did not sound very fitting for him, not even from her lips, not even for her ears. "Mate." He shook his head, she did it too, they grinned together. "Please, Sir, I just go on calling you by your given name."

"Which is?"

"Sir." she laughed and sat down in her arm chair as unceremoniously as he had taken his seat.

Tommy groaned but smiled nonetheless. This was not exactly what he had had in mind earlier but at least they would have dinner together and in a very light-hearted atmosphere at that. "Delivery it is then. Let me invite you to Barbara Haverotti, she's got the best pizza in town, I've heard. And the atmosphere is very authentic."

Choosing her usual service Barbara learned that her boss rather would starve to death before eating salami so it was spinach and cream cheese for him and salami only for her. While they waited for their dinner they discussed the reason why they had a weekend off. Both could not help to even work through some purely hypothetical theories on their lost case but eventually their conversation came to her new hobby. Barbara told him about her meeting Stuart and his wife at the cinema not too long ago, discovering her interest in Shakespeare films. She would never tell Tommy that she just had wanted to try to understand what _he_ likes about that man's plays but she told him that she had visited Lafferty a few times and they had watched more films on DVD. They also read parts of the plays that were good to be quoted on several occasions.

"I know he sometimes drives you mad, Sir, and you have to swear you'll never tell him I revealed his secret, but he had showed me an internet site where you can get all those quotes from." Barbara laughed. Tommy just smiled. It felt good to have her talking to him so open and he would not mind quoting a few lovely lines, let's say, from Romeo and Juliet for example. It also felt good to learn that Stuart's wife had been involved too so there probably was no reason for him to fear that she was seriously flirting with the pathologist. Or worse, dating him behind his back. And of course also not behind the back of Stuart's wife.

* * *

It had been such a pleasant afternoon and seeing him simply smile at her and listen to her rambling Barbara almost had forgotten that she should not think of Lynley like she actually was but the ring of her doorbell stopped her from drowning in his dark eyes and her mind from telling her in capital letters that she was deeply in love with her boss. The ring of her doorbell also stopped him from saying a foolish line from that play he had in mind.

The delivery boy had arrived and Tommy was able to listen to their conversation.

"Hi Barb!" the young man said. "So hungry today that you ordered two?"

Barbara laughed. "No, Jonah, but sometimes I actually do have guests. How much?"

She paid and got the pizzas and a bag with some additional treats. "Some muffins for you. It's on the house. They had to be sold today. Now you could give him another dessert, darling."

Tommy could very well picture the smirk Jonah gave Barbara. He gritted his teeth when he heard her responding laughter.

"Jonah!" she reprimanded him. "Oh, you have chosen that special bag, haven't you?"

"And doesn't it fit, Barbie? Sweet surprise? Hm?"

"Naughty boy!"

"Always at your service, Ma'am. Have a nice night, darling!"

"Shut up, lad, or I'll record you for driving through the pedestrian zone again. I know your route."

"Oh, yes, please, handcuff me."

Again Tommy heard her laughing. "Bugger off, Jonah! See you later!"

* * *

When Barbara returned to her living room she saw the dark expression in Tommy's face. "You okay?" she asked and served their pizzas.

"Hm, yes." She knew he was not. After a few bites he mumbled past some pizza between his teeth that she had been flirting with the delivery man. "Haven't you? You seem to see him often."

"Yes, Sir, I do. Because I am not in the convenient situation to have a butler preparing my dinner when I come home after a long day at the office with no time to get to the coop." A stupid hope arose. Was he jealous? Bullshit, of course not. Not of Jonah. That cute boy barely had the first signs of fluff on his chin. She dug her teeth into her salami pizza to get rid of that silly thought.

"I'm a bit jealous." He winked at her. She knew he was joking, he _had_ to be joking. A few bites more and he continued admitting that he even had been jealous when he had heard that she was spending so much time with the pathologist. "Of course I know he's a married man but I know that he's also a bit casual with everything concerning that matter."

"What matter?" Barbara innocently asked before it dawned her. "Oh. No... Jealous of Stu?! What? That's stupid, Sir!" Barbara had not yet decided if she should be flattered or humiliated by his insult.

"Not at all. I know Lafferty."

"Not really, it seems. And of course it's stupid, Sir. There's absolutely no need to be jealous. I mean... after all he's a married man and even _if_ I would fancy him, I'd never reach out my tentacles for someone who already is a husband to someone."

The look she gave him made him wonder if she was thinking of that evening when he just had returned from his so-called honeymoon with Helen. In fact Barbara was but she never would have admitted it to Tommy. She averted her eyes and continued. "He may be a bit buoyant but he loves Mathilda. We just hang around from time to time because of our shared interest in bikes, you know. Polishing, riding, screwing, such buddy things."

"Screwing?" Tommy raised an amused eyebrow.

"Screwing at the bike, Sir." Despite her slight blush Barbara rolled her eyes and then started to laugh. "Lately we always were covered in machine oil when we met." Then she ran her fingers through her hair. It still was a bit unfamiliar. Pensively she mumbled that she was glad that she had cut it short.

Having finished Tommy leaned back into the cushions of her sofa and lovingly watched her. Quietly he interjected that she looked beautiful, even with her hair short and in this light blonde colour, or rather because of the new style. "It makes you look even younger and s...porty." he muttered with a smile. He almost had said she looked sexy. Which she of course was in his opinion.

* * *

His stare made her nervous and his confession that he thought she was beautiful had let her heart skip a beat. With just the hint of a crack in her voice Barbara went on speaking. "Because it's so much easier to handle. With the helmet and stuff and not only concerning motorbike riding and screwing. Stop grinning, Sir." Now she also had to grin. "In the morning I just have to comb it and it already is a hairdo. It's not those undefined long streaks any more. Although... yes, the colour was a bit blunt, I think."

"Barbara..." He wonders if she was aware that he still was looking at her. He could not care less about her hair or whatever clothes she wears because he loved her for being what she was. He loved how her body was melting into his so easily on that bike. He also loved to listen to whatever she was telling, he liked the way she argued with him, discussed with him, keeps him grounded and soothed his temper so easily, ignored his title and sometimes even his higher rank when she fought with him about different opinions, especially on a case. She was herself even on that boring function at Howenstow or at any other situation she felt awkward in but always tried to make the best of it. And she was beautiful.

"But anyway I'm quite pleased with it." Barbara tried to ignore his stare. She even tried to ignore that he was about to say something so she continued. "Probably I'm also more convincing towards suspects with the hair being short. You know, that-"

"I love you!" he simply said with a soft voice, completely ignoring what she was talking about.

"...thing with tough... copper... that... ?!" Her voice slowly died down until she stopped mid sentence and turned her eyes onto his openly affectionate and tender face. Tommy kept looking at her very seriously.

Anyway, he must be joking. "You... No... No, Sir, you... ?"

"Yes, I do."

"No..." Barbara whispered. She knew he was poking fun at her.

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	8. 8th Chapter of Horsepower

**A/N:** Yes, Tommy, say it plain! ;-) No, I don't think it is too straight forward... *giggles* **  
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Keeping his eyes on Barbara Tommy explained that he had just figured out that he probably had loved her for a very long while without recognising it. "Without recognising what it actually was what I felt all the time. But it seems that I've been fond of you from the start of our partnership. It later had turned into friendship and finally love and it obviously had deepened over the years."

"Years?!" Barbara echoed weak and swallowed down the lump in her throat.

It was good to finally talk about his feelings and to finally name them. Tommy poured out his heart to Barbara. He told her about those little signs that his mind, his stomach, his heart and even sometimes his knees had sent to his brain but had gone by unrecognised. He had not realised what it truly was that had dragged him towards her, that always had made him miss something whenever she had not been around. "And finally today I learned that it was love all those years. _All_ those years..." His expression had become slightly pensive and he paused. Barbara still looked at him in silence but he could not read her face clearly. Still there was shock displayed in it but also fear and Tommy could see a certain, well known defensiveness building. He had to reassure her so she would keep that wall down. "And I also realised not only do I love your personality, your strength, your wit, your sharp remarks, your tenderness towards those who deserve it and your rigour towards those who don't. This motorbike ride today had been the hell for me, a test for my decent restraint. Because it had made me see that I'm not only admiring your character. I also have realised that you're a woman of flesh and blood and that you indeed have a very sexy body."

The second he had said it he knew it had been the wrong thing. Something snapped in her head and he could tell from the changing expression on her face that it was not the right connection, it was not how he would have wanted her to react. Although he used his disarming boyish smile again and although she wanted to believe him because it felt so good to hear him saying what she always had wanted to hear, Barbara started to grumble. She could not react like she actually wanted to. Instead of rushing into his arms, ignoring his clumsy declaration about her physical appearance and enjoying what he had said about his love for her, enjoying his affection, she only acted like she always did when she could not handle the niceness of life, the sincere gentleness people gave her. She corked up her feelings and only leashed out at him.

"Oh, shut up. No sweet talking to me, Sir, just because none of your ladies had been around you for too long so now you're bloody oversexed and underfucked. Don't mistake sexual attraction for love, Sir. You only want to have a shag with me now just because you know I have been solo for even more years than you and probably would _love_ to be nicely bumped and after we've had that hot bike ride... in the sun... and some cans of beer." She hesitated and watched him approaching. Fear, hope, joy and anger washed over her and mingled with the need to be stopped from saying stupid things. "What are you doing?!" she asked him.

* * *

Tommy had gotten up from the sofa but not, like she at first had thought and hoped, for coming over to her and kiss her. He had gone past the armchair and towards the door where he put on his jacket and prepared to leave. In fact he looked a bit sulky and angry too.

"I'm not here to..." He waggled his hand through the air on the search for the right word but then he used hers. "... _shag_ you, Barbara, and I'm more than sober. I love you. Body _and_ mind _and_ soul. That's why I'll leave now. You've heard what I feel for you but I can wait until you realise I really _meant_ what I said and I can wait until you perhaps one day allow me to properly make love to you if you feel the same. Not today but from now on I'm going to show you how much I care for you and that it's absolutely not about simple sex, or a single joyful night. I'm going to... well, _court_ you until you understand that I really _do_ love you. Even if it takes forever and a day and we have grown old before you realise it too and allow yourself to return the feelings I think, I really _hope_ you do have for me. We'll meet on Monday in the office if not another case comes around. Although I doubt that they would call _us_ after my stupid behaviour in the woods. Anyway, have a good night tonight, Barbara. As for my part I probably won't fall asleep, but if so I know I'm going to dream of you."

A grim and deeply hurt expression in his face and a last sad look towards Barbara Tommy went and closed the door behind him, not loud, just normal, and left a dumbfounded Barbara behind, still sitting on her sofa and slowly starting to cry. He had declared his love for her, something she had dreamed about forever but never thought it to ever happen, and she simply had accused him of only wanting to have sex with her. She had messed it all up. She hated herself with all her heart. She simply should have allowed herself to enjoy whatever short pleasure he had in mind or maybe even a slightly longer relationship. Barbara told herself she should have taken as much of him as he was willing to give her and have him as long as he was in the mood to go on having her. Whatever little bit of affection he would have given her would have been better than what she had now. Barbara tried to force herself to stop hoping. She forced herself to believe he never would be starting to court her. She gave a short teardrop smeared laugh about that word. He would not court her on Monday or ever, she tried to tell herself. Tommy- no, _Lynley_ would forget about her as soon as the cool night would start today. A sob shook her body.

And what if he truly had meant what he had said so tenderly to her? So serious and calm? With a long earnest explanation that sounded as if he was exploring those feelings for the first time himself. It all had sounded so wonderful. Even his clumsy and untimely confession that he also adored her physically.

What if he really loved her?

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	9. Nein

**A/N:** Thanks for your reviews! I've read them in my e-mails although they don't appear here at the moment. There's another FF issue with it. (Forthe loveofcamelot13: You're so right! :-D)

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Eventually she dried her tears, straightened her back and tried to forget about her bloody stupidity. In some sort of haze she dug deep into the dismantled parts of her motorbike, cleaned what needed to be cleaned, exchanged what had to be exchanged and put it all together again.

In the end she even had put herself together again. While Barbara had repaired the bike she had let her mind wander free wherever it had wanted to go to. She had thought about everything that had happened today, everything Tommy had said, the bike ride, the wonderful afternoon, the enjoyable dinner, the declaration of his love for her. She also had thought about their relationship and how far it had gone from the day when they first had met until today, what they had gone through during those ten years plus, how close they actually had become. Finally she decided on ignoring her own stubbornness and admitted that she had put her into that quandary completely on her own. He had said he loved her and she had messed it up. Only she herself could pull her out of that swamp again. She was the one who now had to make the next step. She was the one to apologise that the evening had gone wrong.

Barbara was the one now who had to show Tommy that she believed him. In fact she was the one who had to tell him that she loved him too.

That decision made she quickly showered and together with all the machine oil she washed away the last remnants of doubt and fear. Then she put on her leather pants and riding boots, grabbed her helmet, her jacket and her gloves, almost jumped onto her bike and drove to Belgravia.

Procrastinating the inevitable moment she of course took the longest route possible.

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Finally there in the last light of the sun Barbara stopped in the middle of the road in front of his house, provokingly roared up the engine a few times in neutral, then looked up to his window. There he was, standing behind a wafting curtain. He did not hide that he had seen her. Barbara roared up the engine once more, then took off the helmet, put it on the fuel tank in front of her and with still running engine she kept standing there, her eyes strictly staring down the road. She almost prayed she had done the right thing. If this turned wrong it would be the most embarrassing moment ever. Trying to keep calm she deeply breathed in and out and started to count seconds.

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After she had had accused him Tommy had been deeply hurt. He had driven home, had thrown his helmet into the corner of his entrance hall and had put off the motorbike things as quickly as he had had decided to buy them. In sweatpants and with two fingers of scotch in his glass he then had stood in his kitchen blankly staring at the huge fridge door. Finally he had recapitulated how that conversation had turned into a disaster of anxious misunderstanding and stubborn pride. He had sighed and shook his head. This was so typical for them.

He had to change that. Tomorrow he would show up at her doorstep and try again but today he would just leave the whiskey in the glass and not drink himself half blind and completely numb what he first had had in mind. With a glass of orange juice and some loud music he then had tried to drown out his stupid mind thinking about too many possible ways this Sunday could go. Tommy knew he would hash and rehash it for the rest of the night. No, he probably won't find much sleep.

When the record had come to its end he had not bothered at all to get up and listen to the other side. He just had sat there thinking and watched the ceiling until he had heard the repeated roaring of a motorbike outside of his house.

From behind the curtain Tommy clearly had seen her. At first his injured pride again had tried to make him not wanting to get to her even though she was offering peace but before he realised he had changed his mind, or better ignored his stupid pride, his legs already had slid into his new bike trousers, his feet had jumped into the boots and he had put on his biker jacket as if his body was on autopilot, mocking his mind for being so slow. Then he grabbed his helmet and was through the door before his actions fully had sunken into his mind.

She still looked gorgeous in leather and he had not forgotten how enjoyable their previous ride had been but he had to be sure of her intentions so he hesitated on the top landing of the steps at his entrance door and looked down to her. _Please speak to me!_ his thoughts addressed her.

* * *

Barbara kept her eyes on the road when she spoke to him. "You've wanted another ride?" Then she turned her head to face him. "...Tommy?" She had thought about that sentence all the way here. He had to understand that she was here for getting a second chance. Finally hearing it aloud she realised how much she actually had said with this single sentence. She hoped he would understand that she told him she had been stupid. She hoped he would understand that this was her way of telling him that she mirrored his feelings for her. She hoped he would understand that this was her own unique way of saying _I love you!_ to him.

* * *

He understood. His mind jumping in joy and his legs taking two steps at a time he almost flew down towards her.

Barbara felt her heart beating fast against her ribcage when he stopped only right next to her, gently took her chin, briefly caressed the corner of her mouth with his thumb and then slowly bent down to her. For a second he hesitated and searched for approval in her eyes. With an almost invisible nod of her head her eyes fell close and he could hear a breathed "Yes." shortly before his lips met hers in a simple, firm but still soft and slightly lasting kiss. When their lips disconnected she looked into his face to see an almost unbelieving smile and very happy eyes.

"Chop over, Barbara." he tenderly said. "I'll drive."

But Barbara quickly looped her free arm around his neck and pulled him back down to her. She was very sure of what she wanted and she had decided that she would not waste another second. Eagerly she already had opened her mouth when their lips met a second time and her tongue welcomed his with joy and a lustful twirling dance. Tommy's hand that did not hold his helmet sneaked around her leather clad waist and pulled her into him. Even though she was in need of air she kept his face down on hers a little longer with her hand in his nape. Her fingers dug deep into his hair before they broke apart and she gave him a slightly nervous and very breathless smile. Instead of referring to their kiss or to the fact that he loved her, and she him, she picked up his wish to drive.

" _You_ want to drive my infernal machine?" she unbelievingly asked millimetres away from his lips. Her hand only had slid onto his shoulder and she gave him another soft wet kiss.

"Yes." he nodded and squeezed her waist. His lips still lingered on hers so he increased the pressure just a bit to share another sealing kiss with Barbara. "I want. And I'm going to make this our longest ride ever because I'm definitely not intending to ever let it end."

Not caring about his neighbour's car being unable to pass her motorbike Tommy and Barbara shared another long and tender kiss.

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 **A/N:** Our little ride ends here but I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for your reviews.

 **Tess**


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